Complaining is rarely the most productive way to handle a negative situation. It may feel good in the moment, but studies have shown that complainers were less satisfied throughout their workday and found their bad moods carried over to the following morning.
So how do you complain in a way that actually feels OK afterward? Here are some strategies to try:
1-Try the “complaint sandwich”, as coined by psychologist Guy Winch. You start with a kind opening line that makes it easier for your audience to hear the complaint. The complaint comes next. You finish it off with another kindness, which softens the blow.
2-Know the reason you’re complaining, even if you don’t have a solution to the problem. Be clear (to yourself and the person you’re complaining to) that you just want to vent and get things off your chest to feel better. No solution needed. You just need someone to listen.
3-Be able to let go. According to studies, there are two ways to ensure you don’t dwell in negativity and constant complaining. One is to do it in moderation; the other is to pick your audience carefully. Figure out the purpose of your complaint, what you want from your audience (a solution? Just venting?), say what you want to say, then move on. Productive complainers don’t dwell.
Try these ideas the next time you feel a good venting session coming on. They are effective both at work and at home. Understanding the purpose makes complaining feel more productive rather than just aimlessly blowing off steam.
